I know all about Gemini relationships. The love of my life was a Gemini. We met in a supermarket and lived together for four years (not in the supermarket). I wish I had known then what I know now. Now I must say before I start pontificating about astrology that I know nothing about the subject. I do not even believe in astrology. I think it is a load of male bovine excrement. This is because I am a Taurus, born under the sign of the bull. Taureans, of course, do not believe in astrology. That is a well-known fact.
Before I start on the subject of Gemini relationships, let me qualify my statement that I don’t believe in astrology. I belong to the Two Ronnies’ school of astrology. They gave out a snippet of news on their comedy programme many years ago. Little Ronnie said, ‘The world of astrology was dealt a severe blow today when twelve thousand Taureans were crushed under a lorry’.
Of course, believers in astrology will tell you that you can’t generalise about different people. Everybody is different, even Taureans and Geminis (is there a plural of Gemini?). But there is definitely something in it. Somebody read me the typical character traits of a Taurus, and they were me exactly.
But the love of my life definitely did believe in astrology. Unfortunately, we fell in love before she knew my star sign. If I had known her star sign, I would have run as far as I could in the opposite direction, not pausing until I had cleared the continent of Europe. Those of you who know about these things will realise that Gemini relationships with Taurus are doomed. If you don’t believe me, just check out perfectromanticideas.com and see how good Taurus and Gemini are together.
Let’s talk about sex. I like talking about sex. Sex is my favourite subject. Sex is the only reason we poor downtrodden men stick with the battle of the sexes. Well, sex with this Gemini was certainly a battle. All she ever did was lie there and wait for things to happen. ‘Cold and unemotional’ is something I read about Gemini when I was doing the research for this page. ‘Imaginative but lacking physical know-how.’ Basically, she wouldn’t do a thing for me. She just wanted to lie there and let me screw her. That’s fine up to a point, but the novelty very soon wore off.
It was a few weeks into the relationship when I got the biggest shock. She had casually said something about ‘Twins’. Gemini the Twins. We were in bed one night and she was actually being quite affectionate for a change. Then she had to get up and go to the bathroom. Somewhere between the bedroom and the bathroom she changed places with her evil twin sister. The person who came back to bed was definitely not the same woman I had fallen in love with. The change was dramatic. That was the first time in my life that I thought there might be something in this astrology rubbish. Taureans, here is my advice to you: never indulge in Gemini relationships. It is just too much hard work. Go and masturbate instead, you will have much more fun.
Anyway, she came back to bed (we were at her place), looked at me, and said ‘Are you still here?’ Don’t you think you should go home? You have to work in the morning.’ How kind of her, so thoughtful. But definitely not the person I had just been making love to. And so it continued for four years. I never knew which of the terrible Gemini twins I would be meeting next. But I was madly in love with one of them, so I put up with the other.
Astrology? Bunkum. Gemini relationships? Fine for other star signs, but not for Taurus. Take my advice. Every time you meet somebody new, find out their star sign, then look it up on your astrology compatibility chart. Then you know whether to run a mile or hang around.
As I know nothing about astrology, I am giving you a link to a site where there are myriads of experts just waiting for you to talk to them. I thoroughly recommend that you take a look at it. It will answer all your questions about Gemini relationships, and any other relationships.
My Psychic Advice