The Real Texas Chainsaw Massacre

'What do you call the useless flap of skin on the end of a penis? A man.'

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The film classic 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre' is fictional. But there was actually a REAL Texas Chainsaw Massacre. This is a cautionary tale about meeting people on the Internet. You never know who is at the other end of your computer.

A few years ago an elderly woman in North England struck up an online relationship with an elderly Texas gentleman. To cut a long story short, he ended up moving to England and marrying her. At first all went well and they were very happy, but then cracks started to appear in their relationship. He was obsessed with guns and hunting, and became a firearms consultant to the local police. He spent long periods away from home and would always return with game he had shot. Then he started abusing his wife. After some time, she was a prisoner in her own home, and couldn't do anything except put up with the abuse.

She wouldn't say anything to her friends, but one of her neighbours became suspicious of her husband, whose name was Robert Kleasen, and googled him. He turned out to have a criminal record, and had been in prison in New York for firearms offences. The neighbours wrote to the governor of the prison, and eventually they were given a copy of his prison file. Robert Kleasen had been convicted of murdering two missionaries in Texas and dismembering them with a chainsaw. He spent years on death row in Texas but was finally released on appeal. By now, DNA evidence was available for this cold case, and the authorities in Texas applied to have him extradited. Unfortunately, he evaded justice one more time by conveniently dying of a heart attack.

Just goes to show, we should all be very careful about whom we meet on the Internet. --------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------

I suppose we all wonder about what people get up to in the privacy of their own home. The problem with subjects such as sex is that being a fly on a wall while your neighbours roger each other senseless is unlikely to happen, so we have nothing to compare with our own sex life, and hence many of us wonder if we are 'normal'. Until, of course, some kind newspaper tells us what everybody else is up to:

The Sex Files

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The next edition of this newsletter will be sent to you in four weeks' time, as I am giving myself some time off for Christmas. May I take this opportunity of wishing you all a Merry Christmas and best wishes for the New Year.

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